冬季弧:如何在 90 天内改变你的生活(终极指南)
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Transcript
Chapters12
90 天冬季篇:终极变身指南
00:01All right. Hello and welcome to this training. As you can see from the title, what we're going to be covering today is the 90-day winter arc of total transformation. As you can see from the overview, what we're going to be talking about more specifically is first defining your north star, creating the health foundation, commanding the wealth engine, reclaiming power in love, reshaping the self, installing habits, and sustaining the winter ark.
00:22after which we're going to discuss the
定义你的北极星:为什么方向胜过动力
00:28review and your action items for the day or the next few days. So without further ado, let's get started and talk about defining your north star. So no journey will really hold if you don't know where you're actually going. You can train harder, you can uh read more books, you can earn more money, uh you can meet new people, but without a fixed point in the sky, you really circle endlessly and mistake movement for progress.
00:52Now, the north star is that fixed point. It will act as your compass when you're confused, your anchor when life throws you off, and your standard when temptation hits. Without it, every habit you try to build will really lose traction and every discipline will fade and every setback will really feel like collapse.
01:14With it, every day will have direction and direction will create inevitability. Now, think of your north star as the architecture of your desired reality. It is a designed map across the four pillars of health, wealth, love, and self. Each pillar must be accounted for because if one is missing well the structure will lean and eventually it will crumble and this clarity will remove any hesitation.
01:42Instead of asking yourself if you should do something you will now know instantly whether a decision aligns with the life you've chosen. So start by defining what optimal health actually looks like in your world. You cannot chase someone's else's version of it.
01:59You must actually decide your own otherwise you will not be so you will not want to actually achieve it. Your body and your nervous system and your brain and your mind knows when you're chasing someone else's goal. So write down what you weigh, what your energy feels like when you wake, uh what your physique looks like in the mirror and how your body actually moves in space and decide what performance you demand from yourself.
02:16Maybe it's the strength to squat double your body weight. Uh maybe it's the endurance to run 10
健康基础:增强能量、力量和纪律
02:33kilometers. Maybe it's the discipline to maintain clean nutrition year round. These non-negotiables will turn health from an idea into a real standard. Now once health is outlined, the next frontier is really wealth. Because without resources, your freedom and impact will always remain pretty limited.
02:52So financial sovereignty will dictate the scale of your choices. You must define exactly what that means to you. And so you need to decide how much you earn, how it arrives in your bank account, and what level of freedom it accompanies it.
03:06So specify exactly how much you're making and exactly how you're making it. Those numbers will create targets. And so after that, you need to determine what vehicles will generate that wealth. So is it a client-based business that produces immediate cash flow?
03:25Is it investments that basically multiply your capital or is it some kind of digital assets that scale infinitely? Most importantly, do these systems actually serve you or do they own you? Because if you choose the wrong structure, it will turn wealth into a prison instead of freedom.
03:44So you really need to choose the structure that aligns with you the best. Now, wealth establishes freedom, but without the right people, freedom quickly mutates into isolation. So, you need to define the relationships that actually expand your potential instead of drain it.
04:04Without clarity here, you will really fall into default dynamics that steal energy from every other pillar. And so, you need to be clear about who you're with and the dynamic you actually want. And you need to define polarity, connection, respect, and depth.
04:17This is about romantic relationships. And so a strong romantic bond will amplify your mission while a weak one will sabotage it silently. So you need to be really careful who you choose to be your partner. Now when it comes to your social circle, well here you need to decide who belongs in your corner.
04:42Are they ambitious? Are they disciplined? Are they supportive? or do they tolerate mediocrity and pull you back into comfort? The people around you will harden or soften your edge. So you need to choose them deliberately. Now love creates expansion but expansion without inner alignment will always fracture.
05:00So the final pillar is your inner world. Without strength here, well the rest collapses under pressure. So you need to decide what your internal state feels like daily. Are you focused? Are you grounded? Are you driven? Or do you drift, react, and scatter?
05:14Write the version you demand from yourself until it becomes non-negotiable. And choose whether you live on purpose or merely pass time. A man or a woman who know their mission will move differently, speak differently, and act with gravity.
05:33So without a mission, even abundance will feel hollow. Now once all those uh four pillars are defined clarity alone isn't enough because vision without structure will always remain fragile. So we need some structure here and we're going to use
ABT 框架:实际 → 生成 → 时间线
05:52uh a for framework a formula that I've discussed in a previous video which is the ABT framework. So here you use the ABT framework to turn your vision into a measurable trajectory. What that means is first when we're talking about the letter A, it stands for actual.
06:07So that means where are you now? And you need to be brutally honest and you need to write all those things down. Where are you in terms of your health? Where are you in terms of your wealth? Where where are you in terms of your love and relationships?
06:24Where are you in terms of yourself? And be brutally honest. Meaning obviously don't pretend you're further ahead than you are, but also don't pretend that you're behind where you are where you are actually at. So um be brutally honest. Write write down your current numbers.
06:47If you don't have numbers, turn everything you can into a number because numbers make things tangible. They make things measurable. And so habits, moods, outcomes, everything needs to be written down. And again, pretending you're further ahead will rob you of the urgency needed to change.
07:00Pretending that you're behind where you actually are uh will just make you feel depressed for a lack of a better word. So uh now the next thing is as I said numbers are numbers here are non-negotiable. Uh data makes reality unavoidable. So you need to put everything on paper so the mind cannot hide and you need to turn it into a tangible real number that you can actually you know look at and improve on.
07:32So next is uh where exactly do you want to be? Uh so that's what the letter B stands for. It stands for becoming from the ABT framework. So meaning where do you want to be? describe the exact target state uh that you want uh as if you are already living in it.
07:56Meaning you need to actually write down for the same things you actually wrote down in the actual uh part of this framework. You need to write the becoming part. So where do you actually want to be? meaning paint it with detail, paint it with color, paint it with sensation so it feels inevitable and attach numbers to it as well.
08:18And then you have a clear number of where you are and a clear number of where you want to go and once that is done now you know what the gap is. So this is not about uh minor improvement this is about becoming unrecognizable compared to the person you are today.
08:38So obviously those numbers need to be bigger um and they need to be pushing you. However, they shouldn't be too big because that on the other hand will unm will demotivate you from actually following these things. So the next thing is uh the timeline.
08:54So you need to decide when it will be real. Without a deadline your north star will collapse into fantasy. So make it close enough to feel urgent but far enough to force reinvention and 3 months is actually or 90 days is perfect for that.
09:14And then define how you know how you'll know you've actually hit the goal. A clear
真实案例:如何在 90 天内减掉 10 公斤
09:20checkpoint and this is why we I just talked to you about numbers. A clear checkpoint turns those dreams into actual goals and obligations that you need need to hit. Now, as an example here, if you, for example, currently weigh 90 kg or 198 lb, and you have undefined muscle, inconsistent eating, then your northstar might be 80 kg or 176 lb at 10% body fat, vascular discipline, training five times a week by the beginning of next year.
09:52So as you can see if we apply the ABT formula here we have A meaning actual is 90 kg 198 lb per nutrition and consistent habits. B is becoming meaning 80 kg 176 lb lean strong training with precision. Then 10 T is the timeline which is 90 days from now.
10:21And from now on, every day basically answers to that date and every action answers to that date. And now you can see the structure. Uh yet clarity by itself is never really enough because clarity will expose the gap. Um and the gap will demand transformation deeper than goals.
10:43So most people fail because their vision is vague. They just want more money. They want want better health. They want stronger relationships and they haven't defined what any of those are. Yet the nervous system ignores vague language and so it only obeys specificity.
10:56If your outcomes aren't defined clearly, your decisions will wobble, your actions won't really be there because you actually don't know what you're trying to act on and your standards will collapse and your momentum will generally just over time bleed away.
11:15And so ambiguous goals create hesitation. They leave you vulnerable to distraction because there's no fixed target to aim at. If you don't have a target, of course you will get distracted because distractions are clear. They're there. And your goals on the other hand have zero clarity attached to them.
11:36So specific outcomes create sharp decisions. They lock your nervous system into alignment and they make execution natural because every choice becomes binary. Does this serve the mission or does does it take me away from it? Does it serve the mission or not?
11:55Yet even this even specific clarity will never be enough if you do not change who you are. Clarity makes you aware of the gap between where you are and where you must go. And that awareness will either empower you or torment you. So if you do not shift your identity and this is why identity is so important here is because if if you do not shift your identity if you don't be become the person now that will be able to achieve those goals effortlessly that clarity will just become a source of pain.
12:27It will just become this gap that you don't know what to do with. You will know exactly what you want but you will lack the structure to actually embody it. And that dissonance will over time break you. So this explains why vision boards, motivational speeches, and goal setting rituals fail for most people.
12:49They're not bad in and of themselves, but they light a fire for for a brief period of time and then never address the core, which is always identity. So if the identity you hold contradicts the north star you define, well, the identity will win every single time.
13:03Now the solution is not more vision but a new self who can inhabit that vision with ease. Now once the target has been defined and the illusion of clarity alone has been exposed well the question becomes who is the one capable of walking this path to completion.
13:22So in order to become that person we first need
为什么你的身体决定财富、爱和自我掌控
13:29to create the health foundation. So health is the first arena where clarity collides with reality. So without strength, energy and resilience, every other ambition will collapse under the fatigue, under your fatigue and weakness. And a powerful body will amplify on the other hand uh wealth building by giving you focus.
13:49It will amplify and deepen love by making you more magnetic and dependable. And it will stabilize identity by proving you can actually follow through on the things you tell yourself you'll follow through on. And so treat your body as the foundation of the empire you're actually building because a cracked base will always collapse under the weight of of the empire.
14:12And so the next 90 days will test your discipline and your body will serve as the clearest scoreboard of whether you are a ser you are actually serious about transformation because your body is literally a physical representation of your mind and thought processes.
14:24And so energy is the currency that fuels every pursuit. Uh when your body is fueled properly, it's trained effectively and rested consistently, well, you become a walking generator for momentum and energy. Without this, even the simple tasks will feel heavy and progress will stall before it even begins.
14:51So nutrition dictates whether you burn fat, build muscle or stay stag stagnant. It also uh dictates your energy levels. So the first step uh if you need to lose fa lose weight uh or build muscle or uh progress in any of those ways is to determine your maintenance calories, meaning the amount that keeps your weight stable.
15:16And so if you need to lose fat, you need to eat 500 to 1,000 calories below that number. and it and you will lose 0.5 to 1 kilogram or 1 to two pounds of body weight per week. If you need to gain muscle on the other hand, you need to go in the other direction and eat 250 to 500 calories above maintenance to give your body the building blocks it actually requires.
15:42Now, energy balance is law and once you align with it, results become predictable instead of mysterious in terms of body composition. You can just literally dictate how your body looks. Now, from there, regardless of whether you're cutting fat or gaining muscle, protein must stay high.
15:55So, aim for 1.6 to 2.2 g per kilogram of body weight or 0.7 to 1 g uh per pound of body weight. Protein will preserve lean mass during your fat loss phase if you're losing fat, and it will accelerate growth during your surplus phase if you're gaining muscle.
16:15So every meal is an opportunity to reinforce your physique at the cellular level. Now the next thing here in terms of energy is lifting weights. Now lifting weights should be non-negotiable. Muscle is is for more than just aesthetics. It is functional armor.
16:36Literally it raises your metabolism. It protects your joints and sharpens your hormonal profile. And so commit to resistance training three to five times per week and focus on the basics. At least at first if you're just starting out, focus on the basics such as squats, deadlifts, uh you know, bench press, uh presses in general, and pulls until you get to a certain strength level where obviously some isolation will just help you more.
17:09But in the beginning, you can literally build muscles easily with just the basics. I mean, even if you're advanced, you can just you can build muscle with just the basics, but then you actually need some isolation from time to time. Now, once nutrition and resistance training are locked, well, the next level of health is recovery because without it, obviously, the system will break instead of build.
17:30And so, sleep is the most overlooked weapon in transformation. Uh, and in general, it's probably the most overlooked performance-enhancing drug, for a lack of a better word. Uh so while you sleep muscles repair, hormones regulate themselves and your brain consolidates progress and memory etc.
17:48So if you cut this corner you will [ __ ] every other effort you're trying to you create uh for any results you're trying to create. And so aim for seven to nine hours in a cold, dark and silent environment and guard this ritual with the same seriousness as work deadlines because sleep will decide whether you wake up as a predator with focus and ready to tackle the day uh or prey dragging through the day.
18:14So, blackout curtains, no screens before bed, and a set bedtime routine are all just a few tips here, and they will all cue your nervous system to shut down. So, think of your bedroom as a recovery chamber rather than some kind of an entertainment lounge.
18:35Now, a lot of people use their bedrooms as, as I said, entertainment lounges. They watch TV. They play video games in their bedrooms. They scroll on their phone and and go through Tik Tok. Uh watch videos in bed, etc. Look, your bedroom should be for nothing else but sleep and basically reproduction.
18:55Nothing else should be done in there. So the reason for it is because it becomes a literal physical cue that you're going to sleep or reproducing, but it becomes an actual anchor and cue that you're going to go to sleep. And believe it or not, your brain knows when you're in that room.
19:22It knows when you're in bed and it knows that it should get ready to sleep. And so wake and sleep at the same times every day. Uh rhythm will train your circadian system. And once that system is trained, your body will also fall asleep faster.
19:34It will recover deeper and it will wake up sharper. And now recovery solidifies progress. But without discipline, your energy will scatter. Structure is the next layer that converts biology into predictability. Now health is never built on bursts of motivation.
19:52It is forged in consistent rhythms that train the body to act without negotiation. Eat, train and sleep at set times and your biology will fall into autopilot and this will free up willpower and also uh decision uh it will prevent decision fatigue so you can use them on higher battles.
20:12Now lock in a few daily anchors. They can be whatever. They can be a morning walk. It could be a pres-scheduled training window. It could be a protein dominant first meal. These habits stack into a rhythm that will no longer feel forced, but rather it will start feeling automatic.
20:29And design an environment that makes discipline inevitable. Keep high protein prepped uh high protein uh food prepped and visible. Remove junk food from your kitchen and keep your gym clothes ready for the night uh the night before. And shape your environment in general so that the easiest choice is always the right one.
20:47Then track your weight, track your lift, track your sleep, track as much as possible in general because progress measured is progress accelerated. Numbers strip away illusions and they will tell you if your plan is actually working long before your emotions can actually mislead you in both ways.
21:04So once rhythm is established, mastery shifts inward into chemistry because the invisible hormones running through your blood will really decide whether discipline feels like friction or flow. Now your internal environment is
掌握化学:多巴胺、睾酮和皮质醇
21:23just as important and it governs drive, confidence and recovery. When your dopamine is stable, motivation feels natural. When testosterone is optimized, your confidence and aggression towards your goals increases. When cortisol is managed, stress motivates you instead of well making you feel stressed.
21:41So if you master chemistry and discipline, you'll become inst uh you'll become if you master chemistry and discipline uh discipline will become instinct instead of struggle. So dopamine is the neurotransmitter that controls pursuit. And so you need to protect it by reducing cheap hits like scrolling, processed sugar, uh in general processed food, uh and train your brain to spike dopamine from training, deep work, and progress.
22:06And that will happen if you eliminate the others first. So in order for your brain to actually learn to uh derive protein from training deep work in progress, you need to first eliminate the quick hits of dopamine, meaning scrolling, video games, uh Netflix for hours on end, uh processed food in general.
22:32And over time if you eliminate those and you actually train do deep work uh and progress in your life in all the areas you will become addicted to improvement itself. Now heavy lifting, clean nutrition and deep sleep all raise testosterone.
22:48Alcohol, processed food and stress will always crush it. So guard your testosterone because it's the difference really between moving through life with authority or insecurity. And then next is uh stress or cortisol. And stress is unavoidable but you can train your body to respond with calm instead of uh chaos.
23:07So breath work, walking, deliberate stressors like cold exposure or fasting will basically basically rewire your system to stay sharp when uh when your pressure when pressure around you increases in general and stress increases because you're putting your body in intentional deliberate stressors.
23:21And so when actual stressors come um that that are more difficult to things in life when life happens you'll just first off be able to deal with it and secondly you won't be thrown off that much by it. So with chemistry under control the body must now build resilience because strength means little if it breaks under stress.
23:52And so true health is not just looking good when conditions are easy. It is really holding the line when conditions are actually hostile. Now, resilience ensures you endure disruption and recover stronger from it. So, introduce discomfort intentionally.
24:03As we said earlier, using deliberate stressors um and just discomfort on and on purpose will help you with resilience. So cold plunges, long fasts, high-intensity training, all of these force adaptation and these challenges inoculate you against the unpredictable stress of life.
24:27Now the body grows stronger under strain. Each stress followed by recovery in general expands capacity. So the heart beats harder, lungs pull more oxygen, muscles reinforce, and the nervous system in general stabilizes. So this is how you evolve into someone that is literally harder to break.
24:54Now after this longevity will or resilience will carry you into decades ahead and create longevity while others stifen, weaken and complain. You will remain strong, mobile and capable. And this is not going to be luck. It's going to be literally the result of every everything you've worked for.
25:10It is the predictable outcome of deliberate training. And once the body becomes leaner, stronger, and more resilient, well, the base is secured. And with the base set, the next frontier opens, transforming resources into leverage. So, let's talk about commanding the wealth engine.
25:21So, wealth is not about numbers on a screen. Wealth is more so about control. And control will decide
掌控财富引擎:从技能到现金流
25:42how you live. So without money you will remain reactive bending to the demands of others and limited in the scale of your impact. With money you'll be able to buy time, freedom and leverage. Wealth is will not solve obviously every problem but it will amplify every possibility you have.
26:04That is why it is a pillar in this arc. Without financial sovereignty, the body you build and the identity you sharpen will still be at the mercy of someone else's system. Now with it, you'll be able to command your own path. So all wealth is rooted in value.
26:16Money will always uh flow toward the person who can solve painful urgent problems for others. And when you learn to scan your environment for inefficiencies or frustrations or gaps, you'll be able to see opportunity everywhere. Every complaint literally if you look around is currency waiting to be unlocked.
26:42So pay close attention to what people hate doing, what they feel stuck in, uh or where they waste their time and energy. These are going to be clues for you. If uh people are frustrated, they will pay for relief. If they are overwhelmed, they will pay for clarity.
26:55Problems are in general the raw material of wealth creation. So once a problem is clear, you need to design a direct fix. Do not over complicated. The cleaner and more immediate your solution, the faster people will exchange money for it.
27:15Money moves quickest when the link between problem and solution is quick and undeniable. Now a solution in your head is obviously worthless until it's marketed, packaged and delivered and sold obviously. So build it into a service, a product or a system that others can actually buy and then get as much attention to it as possible.
27:35Execution is the bridge between seeing opportunity and actually collecting wealth. So now with the foundation of uh value creation clear, the question becomes well where should you begin if you're starting from zero and in my opinion the most the most reliable starting point is a client-based or service-based business of some sort.
28:02Now this model requires basically no inventory, almost no capital at all and produces cash flow quickly. And you can sell sell your skill, you you can sell your time or you can sell your expertise to solve problems directly for clients or other businesses.
28:21And this is the apprenticeship uh phase of wealth. It will teach you sales. It will teach you delivery. It will teach you negotiation. And it will teach you systems faster than any other model. Anyone can begin here because if you know how to design, write, coach, edit videos, train bodies, build websites, write copy, sell, or market products, you basically already have a business in your hands.
28:47If you package the skill, approach prospects, and close deals, well, you basically have a business with no overhead. Your profit margin will be basically immediate. And so client work generates fast income. If you you sign a deal, you get paid and then you deliver the service.
29:08And this velocity will create confidence. It will create momentum and it will create capital to reinvest into scaling. And the experience of closing clients will also teach you how to persuade which obviously will serve you forever. Now once you're booked with clients, the next step is really leverage.
29:25You can outsource delivery, you can raise prices, or you can convert your expertise into products and programs. A service business is the most efficient launchpad because it teaches you the mechanics while putting money in your account. Now, with a starting point established, the focus really shifts to leverage because no amount of hard work will really compare to the acceleration that leverage will provide you.
29:48So wealth accelerates when your effort is multiplied. The person who understands leverage will outperform thousands who work without it. Leverage in general takes your finite energy and extends it infinitely. Now there are many forms of leverage um and I believe uh Naval explains some of them.
30:10Naval Raviant but here are I've included a few. Now content is obviously one of them but other than that technology is the first form of leverage. Automations, platforms, AI all of those can replace repetitive labor. If you learn to build systems instead of just doing tasks while your productivity just multiplies by default.
30:38People are another form of leverage. Teams extend your reach. And by delegating to specialists, you basically free yourself to focus on strategy and growth. And if you're a leader that can inspire and organize others will well will you be able to achieve 10 times more than any loan operator.
30:49Now the next form of leverage is capital or money. Uh money itself is leverage. Every euro or dollar or pound uh you put into the right vehicle like ads or assets or investments works for you around the clock. So capital compounds while you sleep and turns time into an ally instead of an enemy.
31:11Now obviously as a small caveat here, you obviously don't need all these forms of leverage at the same time. Now it would be good to to have all of them. However, you don't necessarily need all of them uh in the beginning. Uh so focusing on one or two of those at a time is better than not doing any of them at all.
31:41So if you if you look online obviously there are people that are so-called soloreneurs where they maybe have one or two uh employees or freelancers working for them. And so the people leverage they're they're obviously using it but they're not using it to the extent they could.
31:55And so they're mostly using tools, technology, uh, meaning automations, platforms, AI, etc. Or they're using capital, uh, money, money itself, as I said, is is leverage. And so you can use one or two of those and still have a ton of a ton of leverage, for a lack of a better word.
32:20Now, leverage expands your uh reach, but without systems, momentum will obviously stall because chaos consumes wealth. So, a wealth engine becomes sustainable only when it runs on predictable, repeatable systems. Random income spikes will vanish, but systems will always guarantee steady growth.
32:38So, build a pipeline that continually brings opportunities into your world, meaning marketing campaigns, outbound outreach, content, all of those ensure you never run dry. A starving pipeline kills businesses faster than anything else. And transforming leads into paying clients also requires a process, a system.
32:56So sales scripts, follow-up systems, trust building assets, all of those remove guesswork. Now, the highest profits come from keeping clients, not chasing new ones endlessly. So design systems that nurture relationships, upsell naturally, and deliver so much value that clients never want to leave.
33:12And this will turn every deal into a long-term stream of income. Now with the systems humming the wealth engine compounds because small daily actions layered over time create exponential acceleration. So so the most powerful force in wealth is compounding.
33:31Results build upon themselves until growth feels basically explosive. And the longer you play the game without interruption, the more unstoppable you become. So protect your compounding by avoiding unnecessary resets. Each day of uninterrupted growth will basically multiply your returns.
33:51So if you quit too often, you basically restart from zero. Stay consistent and the curve usually turns exponential. Now every skill learned uh compounds with the last and so knowledge is another form of compounding. Your ability to sell, negotiate, and strategize will stack until your decisions feel effortless.
34:13Now, knowledge compounds faster than money because it makes every future decision better and more informed. And so, not only that, but knowledge is easier to acquire than money. And on top of that, that's why all of almost every successful person um you see online or you just read about in general, every successful person has invested a ton of money in acquiring knowledge because the returns from knowledge are exponential and they compound on themselves faster because knowledge is way easier to acquire.
34:48And so if you look online, that's why coaching, reading books, courses, all of those are so important. In general, knowledge in compounds at a faster rate than money because you can buy you can buy knowledge with money and then that knowledge turns into basic it becomes it's an investment.
35:07That's why people say that it's investing in yourself when you buy knowledge because that knowledge then turns into more money with which you can then buy more knowledge essentially it's an investment. So growth accelerates but acceleration without uh defense uh is fragile and so protecting wealth uh becomes as important as creating it.
35:36So wealth will leak if it is not defended with discipline. And this is very important for whether you're just starting out or whether you're make making millions. Uh protection makes sure the machine keeps running even in storms. Now without defense, greed, poor judgment and waste will dismantle everything you build.
35:54And so you need to control your outflow as aggressively as you build your inflow. In the beginning, every purchase. Now, this is not necessarily the case if you're making millions, but in the beginning, every purchase should be judged. Does this reinforce or does it weaken the machine?
36:17Does it reinforce or does it weaken the mission? Each careless expense in general erodess your war chest while each discipline choice compounds your security. Now once wealth is under command through value, service, leverage, systems, compounding and defense, the pursuit must expand into the human domain because money without connection will always feel empty.
36:40So let's talk about reclaiming power and relationships and love. So the relationships in your life will decide whether you rise or whether you collapse. You can build wealth. You can forge a powerful body. You can sharpen your mind. But if you are surrounded by the wrong people, all of that strength will be drained.
36:53Believe me, love in its truest form, meaning romantic, social,
重拾爱情的力量:让你倍增的关系
37:05and communal, is fuel. When you reclaim power and love and relationships, you build a network of people that expand you instead of diminish you. And I'm not talking about chasing attention or validation. This is about establishing dynamics that matter, make you better, hold you accountable, and magnify your mission.
37:17So, the first step in reclaiming power is really aligning your relationships with your mission. Every connection either pulls you closer to your north star or drags you back into mediocrity. Once you see this truth, neutrality disappears and every connection you make as a person will fall into the buckets of basically the life areas or the arenas of life meaning health, wealth, love and uh self.
37:47So you might have a friend that is really big on fitness and so they're basically going to be pulling you in the health aspect. uh you might have a friend that is a business owner uh and making millions a year and so they're going to be pulling you most likely or teaching you things most likely in the wealth aspect.
38:10So people in general also can pull you towards your north star in all of those different arenas of life. And so once you see this truth, neutrality disappears. And you need to write down the people you spend the most time with. And ask yourself if each person actually fuels your ambition or makes excuses for your weakness.
38:38And this audit will reveal instantly why you feel momentum or why you feel stuck. So raise the minimum acceptable standard for who you actually allow in your orbit. When you enforce a higher threshold, lowquality connections will self-eliminate and the right people will be magnetized to you.
38:57And in order to attract the right people, whether it's romantic or in terms of friendships, well, you need to let go of others. You need to clear space before you can add. If you have a full house, you won't be able to add more furniture, right?
39:11The same goes for your relationships. If if your time is scattered across all these different people that are actually pulling you back, well, you won't have the space to attract people that will be pulling you forward. And so once alignment is established, the most critical domain becomes romantic love because it has the most influence over your energy and your stability in general, especially if you live with this person.
39:43So your romantic relationship will either act as your greatest multiplier or your most devast devastating liability. The person you share intimacy with will influence your physiology, your psychology and your drive. So healthy attraction uh in general uh thrives on some form of polarity.
40:01Uh masculine energy in general again seeks mission, drive and groundedness. Feminine energy again in general seeks flow, expression and expansion. When polarity is strong, passion is alive and respect is almost automatic. If polarity collapses, well, attraction in general dies and the bond withers into roommate energy.
40:23So mutual respect is the core of a lasting relationship as well. Respect means you hold each other to standards and push one another towards greatness. So without respect love becomes dependency and dependency o always corrods power. Another important part of romantic relationships here is depth and depth is cultivated through vulnerability but not just vulnerability but vulnerability pair paired with strength.
40:56So you need to be able to share your truth fully but never abandon your frame. The deepest relationships come from being fully seen without necessarily being consumed. Now with a romantic dynamic secured the wider social circle must be examined as well because the people around you with will either amplify your drive or again normalize your mediocrity.
41:13So every man requires some form of a brotherhood that refuses to let him slip. It can be a group of peers who challenge him, uh, sharpen him and drag him forward when he feels like he's slowing down. Or it can be, uh, a digital brotherhood of sorts where you surround yourself with other men uh, and people in general which pull you forward.
41:39And so through communities, for example, online communities. Now, without this, you will unconsciously sink to the level of the of the crowd you tolerate. So you need to choose friends who embody the standards or a circle who embodies uh that embodies the standards you demand for yourself.
41:57So surround yourself with builders, fighters, thinkers who live with urgency. Being around them will in general condition your nervous system to rise or be expelled from that community. And so you will want to rise by default. And true brotherhood will call out your excuses and it will force you to face your weaknesses.
42:15Now, these men will most likely not let you lie to yourself or these people. Uh, and that relentless accountability will carve you sharper than solitude ever could. Now, for women, the same principle applies through sisterhood. The women in in your circle must embody the standards of depth, radiance, and resilience you demand for yourself or any other standard you demand for yourself.
42:43The right sisterhood will reinforce your femininity and it will sharpen your strength and they will protect your standards and remind you of your worth and they will not let you settle for mediocrity in love, career or self-image. They will call you higher and in their presence you'll feel compelled to rise.
43:00So with both romance and social circles aligned, the deeper level of power and love comes from boundaries because boundaries without boundaries love mutates into control. And so most people have no boundaries in their lives because they see them in the wrong way.
43:19Boundaries are not walls. They are standards that dictate how others interact with you. Without them, you will be pulled into the chaos of other people's unresolved issues. With them, you will remain grounded in your own mission. So protect your time and attention as ruthlessly as you protect your money.
43:35Meaning, if someone drains your energy, you limit their access. If someone fuels your energy, you expand their axis. And never tolerate disrespect, manipulation, or laziness. The moment you allow it, once you teach others how to treat you, and you teach them that they can keep treating you that way.
43:46And honestly, it won't be even their fault because you've set the expectations for them. So, boundaries enforce respect without requiring conflict. And once boundaries are in place, the final shift in reclaiming love is turning relationships into multip multipliers for growth instead of distractions from it.
44:06And so how you do that is well powerful relationships multiply your strength. They give you more energy than they take. They make the mission more fulfilling and the path less lonely. A romantic partner that is aligned with your mission will double your impact.
44:24They will handle parts of life that free you to focus on your pursuit. And sometimes you'll handle parts of life that free them to focus on their pursuit. And they will hold you to a higher standard than you hold yourself. And you will be able to hold them to a high higher standard than they hold themselves to.
44:40So, and a circle of allies will create opportunities you could never build alone. Every connection expands your reach, accelerates your learning, and compounds your reputation. And so, the right network makes impossible goals almost inevitable.
44:51And once love has been reclaimed, the next frontier is the deepest transformation of all. Meaning reshaping the very identity that carries you through every battle and and into every future, which is the self. So let's talk about reshaping the self.
45:15Now every result in your life uh is downstream from the identity you hold. Your body reflects
重塑自我:改变一切的身份转变
45:22the standards you tolerate. Your bank account reflects the value you believe you can create. Your relationships mir mirror the rules that you've unconsciously agreed to live by. And until you reshape the identity at the core, every change you attempt will eventually bend back to who you currently believe you are.
45:39And this is why most transformations fail. They are built on top of a self-image that cannot sustain them. If you want to become someone new, you by definition must burn the blueprint of the old self and do something new and build a new one with intention.
45:50Identity is not discovered. Identity is constructed. You're not locked into the patterns of your past unless you choose to keep playing the same role. Every identity has rules and those rules govern the behavior of that identity automatically.
46:09And when you redefine the role, you redefine the rules. And when you the rules change, the results follow. And so you will need the courage to let go of the story you've been carrying. That story may include your failures. It may include your upbringing.
46:26It may include your ex. It may include your old job title. It may include your deadbeat dad. It may include uh your bank balance. None of those things are you. None of them matter. They are past experiences. So stop using them as excuses.
46:39If you keep them as your definition, you guarantee repetition. So you're free to decide a new role. You can choose a different standard, a new rhythm, a better code of conduct. The moment you realize identity is chosen instead of inherited, you'll feel both terrified and liberated.
46:56And that is the moment you actually begin. Now once you accept identity is a decision, the next step is to really deliberately design the version of yourself that can carry your northstar without friction. So build your new identity like a novelist builds a character.
47:15Be specific, be vivid, and be detailed. Do not describe vague traits, but rather design a person with rules, tone, and habits that would make their outcomes inevitable. So decide who this person is at the core. What are their character traits?
47:34How do they act? How do they look and dress? What standards do they have? And write down what they do daily without exception because habits are the evidence of identity. And pay attention to their language. The new identity most likely will not be complaining, hesitating or diluting.
47:44They the speech will reinforce their belief. And so the people uh this identity attracts and tolerates will also be aligned with the standards they embody. and their circle will reflect them. So writing uh the design is the starting po point but identity is installed through repetition because the brain really obeys what it sees and hears most often.
48:10And identity is not a one-time decision. It is a daily installation. So you'll need to read, speak, and embody the new script until your nervous system accepts it as normal. So read your identity statement every morning out loud. The more you repeat it, the more your brain will accept it as truth.
48:28Even if at first it seems like a lie. And each behavior you execute in line with this identity will become a vote for its permanence. The more votes it gets, the stronger it becomes until it is automatic. And remember, the brain starts to believe anything if it is repeated enough times.
48:47By ritualizing repetition, you quite literally embed a new self-image, a new identity. Now, installing the new identity is half the battle, but you must also create contrast by rejecting the old identity at every opportunity. So, make a clear list of what the old self would do.
49:07Just the same way you designed the new character. Write down what the old self actually does in the same way using the same template basically and reject it every time it shows up. If the old self scrolls when when they're stressed, scrolls Tik Tok or whatever, well, the new uh self will reset and does what they need to do.
49:25If the old self snoozes the alarm in the morning, well, the new self gets up immediately. These choices stack quickly and they decide basically which version wins. And so you shift realities based on your decisions and choices. And so if you just make the right decisions, if you make the right choices, you will shift your reality.
49:49Every small choice is a vote in a war between two identities, between good and evil. You can even uh think of it that way. And so you are never neutral. Each moment reinforces either the old pattern or the new design. And once contrast is created, the final safeguard is awareness.
50:10Without that, the mind will basically drift back into what is familiar. So if you do not consciously choose your identity, you will unconsciously recreate your past. The brain defaults to what is familiar even when it is destructive. So without awareness, you will slide back into old language, old habits, and old standards.
50:26And this drift is subtle, almost unnoticeable, but lethal. It erodess your progress slowly until one day you wake up and you realize you're back where you started. So the only way to stop drift is really to rein reaffirm the identity, the new identity, the new self daily.
50:46Identity is not found. It is chosen, then reinforced, and then lived. Now with identity reshaped the question becomes how do you ensure this new version operates without constant willpower? Well the answer is through habits and habits will hardwire identity into action until it becomes effortless.
51:03So let's talk about installing habits. So habits are the hidden architecture of your life. They are the automatic loops running
养成习惯:将新自我锁定在现实中
51:20in the background that decide whether you rise or whether you collapse. And you can define a northstar or even build a new identity. But unless your daily actions lock these choices into place, you will always drift back into old patterns.
51:30Now habits are the infrastructure that basically carries your identity into reality. When your habits align with your vision, momentum becomes automatic. When they do not, failure becomes inevitable. no matter how hard you try. So installing the right habits is what transforms effort into inevitability.
51:49So every action you repeat is really a vote for the person you believe you are. Habits are not just behaviors. They are proof of identity. Each morning uh each morning routine, each workout, each decision to sit down and work compounds into evidence that you are the person you said you would become.
52:08And the brain will always believe what it sees most often. Habits give the brain constant proof until doubt disappears and confidence becomes neutral unnatural. So if your habits reinforce the old identity, you will rebuild the same life no matter how ambitious your goals are on paper.
52:26The loop of your daily actions will recreate your past. then the only way forward is to really behave like the person you're you're actually becoming even before you feel like them. So habits make that behavior consistent until the new version of you becomes automatic.
52:46Once the principle is clear, well the next step is structure because habits without a framework will collapse under pressure and this is where the ABT framework we discussed earlier gains another letter. So now it becomes the ABTH framework.
53:04Uh and so you can use this ABTH model to lock habits into your transformation. Actual, A stands for actual, B stands for becoming, T stands for timeline, and H stands for habits. Now, this sequence basically creates clarity and direction.
53:19Now, actual as we discussed earlier uh defines where you are right now with brutal honesty. So you need to track your routines, your behaviors and the unconscious loops that dominate your days. If you underestimate how often you procrastinate, scroll or skip, you will fail to build leverage for change.
53:37So you need to make it measurable and you need to be honest. So write how many hours you worked deeply last week, how many times you trained, how many meals you cooked versus ordered. All of that data will give you the truth raw and unfiltered.
53:54Now B stands for becoming meaning we define the target self and the habits they execute daily. So imagine what their mornings look like, how they eat, when they train, how they approach their work and write these behaviors as if you already live them.
54:13And this must be specific and clear enough that you could execute it tomorrow without hesitation. And then you raise the bar high enough that your future self feels unfamiliar, not just improved. Habits must reflect a higher standard. Not too high though because that will make you unmotivated to actually follow through.
54:29Uh because the jump will be the gap will be too big and so you will feel like it's unachievable right now. So make them stretch you but not too much. Now timeline or T stands for timeline meaning decide when these habits will be fully installed.
54:42Habits grow slowly at first but when you enforce urgency you force acceleration. So in the case of this video as we discussed earlier it's the winter arc of or 90 days of basically you transforming. So the timeline is 90 days. So make it tight enough to feel pressure and long enough to allow discipline to carve grooves.
55:07And then track whether habits are consistent by the chosen date. Without measurement you'll confuse effort with progress. Now finally the H stands for habits. And so these are the actual daily actions that bridge who you are with who you are becoming.
55:21And you need to design them with precision. So anchor them to existing triggers. For example, after waking, you can hydrate and move. After coffee, you can open your uh identity script. After finishing work, you prep your food. Habits installed through sequence are harder to break.
55:37Now that the framework is laid out, the next step is really auditing because you cannot build new habits without tearing down the old ones. You cannot attract something into your life without making space for it. So write down every habit you execute daily from productive to the to from the most productive to the most destructive.
55:57And this will be the X-ray of your identity. Then you keep the habits that support the future you. For example, early rising, training, uh consistently journaling, planning the day. These are the assets that strengthen your system. Then you identify the habits that are more neutral uh that waste time without necessarily direct harm.
56:15So scrolling without purpose, shallow conversations, errands with no impact, all of these must be redirected and minimized. Then you identify the destructive the actual destructive habits uh that anchor you to your old self. skipping workouts, hitting snooze, getting drunk, eating out of emotion, quitting early.
56:36All these are not small slips. They are anchors pulling you back. Once destructive habits are stripped out, well, you need need to design uh design must take their place and so empty space will always fill itself. So, you need to engineer your days with rituals that pull you towards your future identity and make them vivid and repeatable.
56:56So own the first hour ruthlessly. No phone, no chaos, no drift in the morning. Uh wake, hydrate, move, review your identity and then start executing. If you can control the first hour of your day, you can control the day. Now in the midday uh around lunchtime, reset your energy through some form of a mini ritual.
57:20It could be walking, it could be breathing, it could be reflection or journaling, it could be resetting your posture. Um these small actions will just keep your energy high in general and keep you present at the same time. Now in the evening end the day with reflection and shutdown and review where you won, where you slipped and what you will adjust and prepare the environment for tomorrow so that the next day begins without friction.
57:40With rituals installed, the next step is really reinforcement because habits must be stacked, tracked, and hardened until they become automatic. So link new habits to existing ones so they become unavoidable. After brushing your teeth, you could review your goals aloud.
58:02After making coffee, you could open your identity script. By tying these new habits to existing ones, you basically eliminate the need for decision. And the more seamless the link, the stronger the consistency. Now your old routines are becoming triggers for new behaviors.
58:17So your old self is becoming a trigger now for the new self. And so measure your execution daily. What gets tracked gets improved and what gets improved can compound. Every day check off each habit without gray zones. It's either did you do it or not.
58:35Every week review your totals. Look for friction points where you fail repeatedly and then adjust your actions or routines to make the execution a bit easier. And then each completed check mark becomes evidence and evidence will build your trust towards yourself.
58:46And trust builds belief and belief makes discipline basically effortless. Now when habits are stacked and tracked, intensity becomes the multiplier. So hard habits will accelerate the change by forcing discomfort and pushing you to adapt to it.
59:02For example, you can use cold showers or plunges to teach your body to embrace discomfort instantly. You can use consistent resistance training as both physical and psychological proof. You exercise not only to build your body but basically to prove you are in control of yourself and you can seek situations that stretch your capacity.
59:19Every hard habit that gets completed makes the easier ones effortless by comparison. Now with intensity mastered, adaptation becomes the final step. So habits are not permanent. They must grow with you. And so you need to review your system every month and ask if each habit still serves the next level of your identity.
59:44And if it does not, you need to replace it with a better, higher standard action. Meaning, journaling for 10 minutes may have served you at first, but later publishing daily content might replace it. Training three times a week might have might have been amazing, but now you need to up to five, for example.
1:00:00Growth requires evolution in general. And so, by constantly upgrading your habits, you prevent stagnation. The higher the standards of your rituals, the more powerful the identity they reinforce. Now once habits are installed, stacked, tracked and upgraded, the architecture of transformation is basically set.
1:00:17But even then momentum must be protected because sustaining the ark is the difference between 90 days of progress and a lifetime of progress. So
维持冬季弧线:如何让改变持久
1:00:29let's talk about sustaining the winter ark. So anyone can push hard for a week. Many can endure a month. A few can hold the line for 90 days. But the true measure of transformation is not in the sprint. It is really what happens after it.
1:00:42Now the winter arc is obviously designed to compress identity shifts into a short brutal window of time. Yet the real test is whether you can sustain that uh intensity long enough for the new self to become permanent. So sustaining the ark is about protecting momentum, reinforcing your systems and building resilience against drift.
1:01:06Without this phase, everything collapses back into old patterns once the season changes or the 90 days are up. And with it, you carry the fire forward into every season season of your life. So change always runs in cycles. Energy goes up then dips.
1:01:17Motivation spikes then it disappears. This rhythm is physiology. If you expect constant linear motivation, you will break the first time the energy disappears. So the key to sustaining the ark is really preparing for the dip before it arrives.
1:01:36When you anticipate these cycles, you can refuse to be surprised by them. And everything in life comes and goes in cycles. And you accept the rhythm and adapt your systems to carry you through. So you need to understand that motivation will always drop after init after the initial excitement fades.
1:01:52And this is normal. If you expect it, you can strip it of its power. So, a week from now, your excitement will have probably faded. A month from now, your excitement will have probably faded. And yet, you'll still have 60 days to go. If you expect it, you'll strip it of its power.
1:02:08So, build systems that keep you consistent even when your energy is low. So, meaning prepared meals, for example, pres-scheduled workouts, automatic calendars, all these structures will carry you forward. Every dip will become an opportunity for a rebound because once you push through the low point without quitting, the next peak will arrive stronger.
1:02:24And this cycle will repeat over and over again. And it will compound your resilience with each round and make you more resilient. And so the next layer is environment because no one has the strength to constantly be fighting against their environment forever.
1:02:40So your environment will dictate your success more than your intention. If your surroundings reinforce the new self, progress becomes natural. If they reinforce the old self, relapse becomes inevitable. So, designing your environment is non-negotiable.
1:02:57In terms of your physical environment, you need to clean your sp space of distractions and temptations. Stock your kitchen with good food instead of processed poison. Lay out your gym clothes the night before. Every physical cue should point you toward your north star, towards the right direction.
1:03:12Now most people the way they live is everything in their physical environment is pointing them in the wrong direction. And so then they wonder why they always make the bad choices and why they uh do the the things they don't necessarily want to do or their higher self doesn't want to do.
1:03:28And so now, as far as your digital or online environment, you need to unfollow noise, mute any distractions, remove the notifications from your phone and design feeds that actually deliver knowledge. Now, technology can either train your brain to scatter in thousands of directions or it can help you focus it daily.
1:03:43Now, your social environment is just as important. Shape your self circle ruthlessly. People are environmental inputs, too. If if not some of the mo probably the most powerful environmental input, especially if you're a more social person.
1:04:07If they drain you, you need to cut access. If they fuel you, you need to increase your exposure. Or you don't need to, but you can increase your exposure. The energy of those around you will hardwire into your nervous system over time. That's why it's important.
1:04:25Now with your environment engineered, the next step is to really to sustainability is really feedback. Progress without tracking becomes invisible and invisible progress always dies and makes you unmotivated. Progress is easily sustained when it's measured.
1:04:37Tracking turns invisible growth into visible evidence. And that's important because evidence builds your confidence and in turn your confidence will sustain the momentum you've built. However, without feedback, your discipline will start feeling blind and pointless.
1:04:53you'll see no meaning in it. So, you need to be able to see progress. That's why video games, for example, were designed in a way where you're constantly seeing progress. So, uh turn anything into tangible numbers. Weigh yourself weekly.
1:05:08Track your lifts, log your revenue, record your habits. Hard data will always expose if you're drifting before it sabotages you. And then journaling forces self-awareness. So, you can use reflection to your advantage. Write where you won.
1:05:20What were the wins for the day? where you slipped, uh what improvements could you make, what are the lessons you got from that day, and what will you do differently? Feedback is only useful if it actually produces some form of adaptation.
1:05:35So, use the data to refine your systems, to adjust your tactics, to adjust your actions, and raise your standards. Tracking without adjustment is just wasted effort, honestly, unless you are just a data nerd and you just like seeing the data.
1:05:48But if the winter arc feels like a temporary thing, you will collapse once it ends. If it becomes a new identity, you will sustain it effortlessly. And so the reframe is to see the ark not as a sprint you need to survive and get it over with, but rather as a foundation to live from.
1:06:04One part of this is identity. So you need to speak in absolutes. I am the kind of person who trains daily. I train daily. Those are absolutes. Habit will habits will become part of your identity when you no longer negotiate with them. And another important lesson here is to lean into the satisfaction of the discipline itself.
1:06:25As cliche as it sounds, you need to be able to enjoy the process. The pride after a hard day of discipline will always outlast the fleeting pleasure of indulgence. And so you must learn to enjoy the act of being disciplined. Make the winter ark feel like the baseline.
1:06:44When the ark becomes your normal, anything else uh anything less will feel wrong. And so the final piece here is expansion. Sustainability thrives when the mission continues to evolve. So sustaining momentum requires a moving target. Once goals are hit, new ones must be created.
1:07:03Stagnation is the enemy. Progress feeds itself only when there is always another level to climb. So continuously raise the standard and challenge yourself. For example, if you mastered waking up at 7:00, then aim for 6:00. If you built a 5K a month business, then push for 10K.
1:07:24If you train three times a week, well, try to move to four or five. Expansion keeps the identity alive. And you can also add new layers of mastery. So, you can learn persuasion, then leadership, then public speaking, then creative expression.
1:07:38Each new skill will expand your capacity to create and sustain more momentum and more growth in general and it will translate into all the other areas of your life. And finally, you can attach your habits to a larger mission beyond yourself.
1:07:55When you when your discipline serves something greater like family, community, legacy, the world, first off, the effort gains meaning and it becomes beautiful. The suffering becomes beautiful and it stops being so optional. A great mission that you actually care about will lock in that sustainability into place permanently.
1:08:14And so with sustainability anchored through cycles, environment feedback, reframing, and expansion, the ark is basically done. And what remains is to step back, take a deep breath, and charge ahead. So with that being said, let's go over the review.
1:08:33We talked about defining your north star, creating the health foundation, commanding the wealth engine, reclaiming power and love, reshaping the self, installing habits, sustaining the winter arc, and then we're at the review right now, and finally, your action items for the day or the next few days.
1:08:47So, first commit and lock in 90 days without negotiation. Decide right now that these three months are going to be the line in the sand. The season where you burn the old script and enforce the new one until it becomes automatic. Then execute.
1:09:09Build your daily system. Track your calories. Lift weights. Grow your client-based business. Expand and improve your relationships and rehearse your new identity every single morning. And execute until each action feels inevitable. Then finally, expand.
1:09:19When 90 days are complete, do not collapse. Set a new target immediately and use the momentum you've built to climb to a higher standard. More strength, more wealth, deeper love, stronger identity. Expansion keeps the ark alive and it keeps you alive.
1:09:39With that being said, if you enjoyed this video, make sure you let me know in the comments. Give it a like. Subscribe to the channel for more. If you want to work with me personally, you can hit the second link in the description and book a call.
1:09:45And if you want this document along with this training, then hit the first link in the description and join the free community. And with that being said, I hope this brought a lot of value. If it did, then as I said, give it a like, subscribe, comment below, and I'll see you in the next one.
1:10:05Thanks for being here.